Saturday, October 26, 2013

Day 6 - exercising, playing guitar

Exercising - I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not consider within participation of exercising/am exercise schedule, whether I'm pushing too hard to the point of accumulating a disfunction all bone structure/muscle structure, and even internal organs.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to do this due to the fear of getting out of shape, or becoming unhealthy, or losing a judgment I have towards my body.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to therefor create the value of images, over the real value of what my physical body needs to stay stable, whether in conditions of vigorous exercise, or vis versa.

I commit myself to observe my body/back (spine) to see if I will be capable of participating in the next exercise, within this I therefor commit myself to follow the best diet, where I can stay healthy regardless If I can participate or not. I commit myself to go see a cyropractor for what would be the best option to help my back.

I commit myself to redefine my relationship with physical activity, which best suits my physical body practically, and thus I commit myself t stop the abuse from the excessive work, just to fulfill an illusion/characterized definition of healthy.

I commited myself to start studying health, to recreate the vocabulary which is in relation to my physicl body, and thus I commit myself to eliminate all self interest patterns which iuse to verify my misconstrued interpretation of being healthy.

When I find myself in a hurry to protect this false image that I've related towards health, I slow down my participation, breath with the movements, and primarily focus on how my body feels, in relationship to the work out. If I physically am comfortable to continue, I will en investigate how my body relates to the movements. If I'm not comfortable, I will firstly breath, and that its most practical for my body, and afterwards, take care of my body with food and water, etc, and then, study what's best for the focused area that I found uncomfortable.

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Playing guitar - I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to have fun playing guitar, but then e memorie of when I've been told that I sucked at something domes up, and then relate the judgment towards my playing.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself t then go into comparing myself to other musicians, and where I will create this bias towards their music, as '"too repetitive, too cliche, etc." while enjoying their music too a great majority, but simply comparing myself to suppress my inability t work to their ability. Thus within this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself, to catagorize sound, simply because I've been tod and presented judgment about expressing myself, as if I should just basically be punished for it.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myselfto catagorize 'sophisticated' material, simply because it is sophisticated in relation to my current ability.

I commited myself to redefine my playing as that moment of expression/ability, which is neither a bad or good judgment, for the fact that its already effective due to my physical participation with the music.

I commited myself to understand that when I'm listening to another musician, that I am hearing what they are expressing physically here, and thus I commit myselfto relate my redefined point of playing music, in relation to when I'm hearing another artist, and not as this nonsense energetic experience f polarity to cover up my own fear of expressing myself with music.

I commited myself to not judge my ability, or cmpare this inferior character to better material in relation to my ability, thus Pete as well, but notepad use that as an example to work off of to build myself as a living expression, s that others can equally translate my example to themselves.

When I find myself in fear of expressing myself, due to judgement coming up n reaction to playing guitar/music, or when listening t music, I breath untill I can be more clear of what's here without the various thoughts/reactions that only accumulate the judgment, and I enjoy the music, and eventually come to a point of utilizing that thought which created the limitation of true enjoyment, and not some convenient suppressor for my own accepted and allowed insecurity.

Friday, October 25, 2013

Day 5 - at work

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to suppress self responsibility through creating what others present as a void for myself t continue with love and light energy.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to then go into self conciousness of my physical appearance as a way to continue the survival technique within fear, where I have accepted and allowed myself to base my physical appearance as the energy source for when I'm at work.

I forgive myself that I've accepted Nd allowed myself to thus deliberately create a loss of direction through fogging out what I require working with, with beautiful images, to hide the intent of abuse within myself towards the other co workers, within this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to create fear to us make/buy into the excuses not to focus on what's most effective for what I'm working with.

I commit myself to back track, the moment I experience manipulating what others are presenting as if it is in reaction to me, within this I commited myself t start with the point of insecurity, and why I create this void of self physical expression through polarizing others expressions.

I commit myself to redefine my relationship to my physical body, I. Relation to my work place, and when in relation to males and females. Win this, I commit myself to write out one memory every work day, that relates to why I go into this self conciseness of my appearance.

I commit myself to implement 3 self forgiveness statements out loud every work day,with first slowing myself down with breath, and focusing on what's relavent o my ability of awareness and understanding, with this 3 separate moments of every work day.

Wen I find myself going into a mind trance to fit in to energy as is form of a void, I breath, I slow myself down with movement, as I trace back to the moment of fear, with what I have commited myself within this writting, and also previous writings

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Day 4 - playing guitar

During session - I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I've accepted and allowed myself to be defined as a mother expression when playing music.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to therefor percieve what I'm working with when playing guitar, as bigger than me, like being told that how I'm expressing myself is good or bad - according to my mother.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to thus create self interest within playing guitar as a way of verifying the convenient expressions my mother, and feeling discouraged with the inconvenient expressions/my mother.

I'm commited to take a break once every guitar session, to write out the relationship between my self and what I'm working wi, for 1 week, and then the next week, practice stating self forgiveness out loud to be as effective as to writting.

I'm commited to redefine my expression when in relation to my mother.

I'm commited to redirect myself wi breath wi what I'm working wi and observe myself physically equal to what I'm working with, and thus I'm commited to write the point out on my break, whatever it is in relation to my mother in that moment, or to something else.

I'm commited to redefine my perception of guitar/music/playing music, as a practical form of expression, and his I'm commited to write 1 memory within each point I write about.

when I find myself lost in my mind relationship to an abstract belief about playing music,, I breath, and follow the previous commitments.

After - I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to make the excuse, not to push through and state out loud self forgiveness/self corrective statements.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myselfto become in fear of losing my ego relationship with playing guitar/music, and thus I forgive myself at I've accepted and allowed myself to becoming apathetic further in my session and bored, and just wanting to 'get it over with'.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself t have his sort of depressive reaction within confronting e usual pattern of love and light I usually generate when playing guitar, which in fact has made me much less effective within playing guitar to begin with

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to play guitar, to have this sort of competition with others, from when I wanted to beat one of my friends, in a junior high talent show, and thus i forgive myself that I've accepted and loosed myself to pick up guitar in the first place, from wanting to best another person in music, thus I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to be resistant in transcending from the love and light feelings I've created in my mind when playing guitar.

I'm commited to state self forgiveness once a sessionto practice stabilizing myself firstly when in physical participation with music, and to also ensure that I reach all aspects of my dishonesty within playing guitar/music.

I'm commited to breath and focus with whatif doing when playing guitar and not further accumulate patterns of self blame of trying to hold on to the love and light relationships, us within this, I'm commited t simply start wi self forgiveness statements, and apply those specific corrections when I fall into mind patterns.

I'm commitedt stop playing and move my arms and touch the guitar, to observe the depiction between what's relavent within physical functionality, and what's irrelavent when trying to further suppress with love and light. I'm commited however to continue practicing following my self corrective statements to where I deminish the tendency to go into supression, and therefor actually stand more effectively as life/what's best for all life, and not as a tempted mind robot.

Day 3 - exercising/playing guitar

Excersising: I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to create the notion, that others are judging me, for how my body is moving within physical exercise.

 I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to create the convenience of writing this point out, to try t verify e point of wanting t be superior to another when participating in physical exercise.

 I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to deminish consideration of what it means to be physically intamite its my body, through exploiting my body to control others, and thus inevitably create the tendency to want to impress others, in fear of them exploiting me/punishing me for my expression. Within this, I forgive myself to abuse my physical body to the extent of intamacy I've deliberately deminished.

 I'm commited to investigate the memories, which lead me t believe, that others intend on judging me for my physical expression within physical exercise, thus within this, I'm commited to slow down the patterns, where I will blame others for feeling exploited for my particular movements, and bring it back to self.

 I'm commited to slow myself down currently in breath, and come back here to primarily focus on is point of deminishing within myself, and slow down the rush of my mind for further desires.

 I'm commited to, before workouts/routines, sit down on my bed, and caress my legs, torso, and head, and slowly breath.

 When I find myself deminishing my intamacy with my physical body, in the sake of self interest, I slow down, I breath, I stop all forms of acknowledging, untill I can come back HERE, to therefor observe what should actually be acknowledged win physical exercise.

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 Playing guitar: I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to find it 'hard' to compose music.

 I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to create is point, of creating music being this hard thing, from the very point of self interest of "my music has to be the best music ever made". Win this I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear my own individual expression within working with individual compositions. Us, I forgive myself at I've accepted and allowed myself to create neglect towards other musicians, not realizing at very intention of self interest within what I share win melody sounds, is nevitsbly going to deminish my ability t express myself/equally make sound frm the same earth that produces us sound.

 I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to thus become apathetic wi what I'm working with, and start playing in fantasies of defeating others wi what I create in music.

 I'm commited to create step y step personal theories, and ways of organizing myself t compose, t further be capable of utilizing what I've accepted and allowed myself to be deminished when 'originally' creating something.

 I'm commited to redefine my relationship to other beings on this earth/in the universe who equally produce sound/music, and when I find myself in fear of an inferior expression, I will breath from the earth, listen to the sound I'm playing, and investigate how my co existence wi music exists in all directions.

I'm commited to slow down when I find myself acknowledging is sort of catAgory of what my music sounds like when composing, breath, co exist, investigate the actual moment, and self correct my bias and self judgement within my composition, starting with my technique and genera approach to composing music. When I find myself in struggle to express myself within music, I breath, and redirect myself here physically wi my body movements, and the sound that interconnects.

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Day 2 - Cleaning house, at work

Cleaning house:

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to create he goal of impressing others, and specifically my mom when cleaning my house.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to then get into a rush within my mind, where I will create fantasies of how I will 'succeed' in my body image towards others, music, and how I am progressing win my process, simply due to exploiting my ohysical participation when cleaning my house, from the fear of being punished/being exploited by others.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to therefor merely worry about what I will do after cleaning my house, and how effective/consistent I will be after cleaning my house. Us within this I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to once again, create a void from walking through my limitation with cleaning my house. Within his I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed to try to continue protecting my self interests to control others.

I'm commited to define myself, by moving physically with cleaning my house, and not as a mind drive to intend on impressing others.

I'm commited to slow myself down when I begin creating this notion, that I require progressing win what I'm participating in, to further be consistent.

I'm commited to thus back track my memories, as to why I create anxiety of others exploiting my physical expression/punishing me.

When I find myself in a rush within my mind, while physically moving, I breath, and I continue backtracking t the memory through for using on breath, and movement.

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At work:

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to create the convenience of talking t another co worker, in order to create a void of taking responsibility for my task at work.

I forgive myself thative accepted and allowed myself to specifically talk to males to convey a false image/void, and to also try to defeat the male to win over e female.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to thus fear being exploited at work, and therefor go into social patterns that I have with others as my ego, thus I forgivemyselfthat I've accepted and allowed myself to cringe this pattern from the fear of losing within survival.

I'm commited to simply respond to questions or statements/vis versa related t my being, and breath through the rest of the evening, and focus on the task at hand/what I'm working with. Within this, I'm commited to start utilizing my relationships within communication, and how I create voids with humans universally, and thus create this sense of wanting to control others.

I'm commited to as well start utilizing my relationship to females, and thus equalize my care for males as well as females, vis versa, and thus I'm commited to investigate my relationship to sex/the law of attraction manipulation with sex.

I'm commited to bring it back to one point every work day that relates to how I firstly exploit myself, where I therefor feel heavily exploited at work. Thus I'm commited to always bring it back to self, and stabilize myself when I find myself overwhelmed around others.

When I find myself rushing within my mind to hold onto these attachments with my co workers, I breath, I follow what I'm doing HERE in real time with work, and I walk myself through the fear and temptations, untill I eventually become here with work, in the physical.

Sunday, October 20, 2013

Day 1 - cleaning house, playing guitar

Cleaning house:I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to relate cleaning my house, as something I could be potentially punished for participating in.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to thus go into supression through fantasizing, as a scape goat from working with what's HERE when cleaning my house.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear what will happen if I actually start participating here physically, and facing the points through breath, instead of through suppression with fantasies of accomplishment. Thus within this I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to follow love and light, instead of practicing breathing to utilize myself within e points of fear.

I'm commited to redefine my relationship with cleaning my house throu breathing through one of the points I percieve as punishment every time I write about this specific relationship.

I'm commited t stop myself within fantasizing through slowing down and breathing through the point, until I'm here, and self forgive the fantasy/suppressive point, and continue practicing breathing.

I'm commited to continue utilizing myself through these practices, to face the fears, instead of hiding through them and falling through love and light.

When I find myself in a moment of fear of punishment, and then escape into fantasies/suppression, I breath, I slow don my outs, and I come back HERE, and focus only actual relationship in real time.

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Playing guitar:

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to play guitar, in this sense of trying to make profit, wher wi will fantasize about others watching me play, not realizing that I am only creating this as a void of actually participating in physical relationship with e guitar/music

I forgive myself thative accepted and allowed myself to thus define music that I'm playing/practicing, as boring, simply because I'm not gaining money or profit within actual real relationship to the music.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to rush myself within the desires, and create fear thus from losing these fantasies, thus I thin this I forgive myself that I currently accepted and allowed myself to want to rush through my writting, to go and continue mind participation.

I'm commited to redefine my relationship to music, and play music through investigating equal money, and how I've accepted and allowed myself to participate in physical expression within music, as instead a scapegoat for suppressing the very fear of actual real time expression.

I'm commited to thus redefine my participation skin music as a point of creating feelings and expectations and convenience as a motive to continue playing/practicing.

I'm commited o slow myself down with breath, and take this one point at a time, with the very point I'm focusing in.

When I find myself in fantasy of relationship to profit, I breath, and find myself within e relationship as equal expression to music in real time.